We just got back from 12 days in Cabo San Lucas, Mexico, running a retreat for our graduate students (Nov 2025).

The retreat was in one of the most beautiful places in the world and what the graduates experienced went beyond their wildest dreams.

Here's what some of them want you to know if you are still in a place of pain and confusion.....

Ben writes....

Three years ago, my world shattered. I discovered my wife's betrayal, and in that moment, everything I thought I knew about my life, my marriage, and my future crumbled. I was devastated, angry, and utterly lost. I had the divorce papers ready to file. I was done.

That's when I spoke with Pete.

I'll be honest—I was skeptical. The last thing I wanted to hear about was "unconditional love" when I felt so deeply betrayed. But something in that conversation made me pause. Pete didn't promise me easy answers or quick fixes. He simply invited me to try the programme, and something in me—maybe desperation, maybe hope—said yes.

What happened next was nothing short of phenomenal.

I can't explain how quickly things began to shift once I truly embraced what was being taught. The unconditional love that Pete and the programme introduced wasn't the weak, doormat kind of love I feared it would be. It was powerful, transformative, and healing in ways I never imagined. As I learned to offer this love—first to myself, then to my wife—I watched wounds that seemed impossible to heal begin to close.

The changes in me were profound. I found a peace I hadn't known in years, maybe ever. I discovered strength I didn't know I had. And our marriage? It didn't just survive—it became something better than it was before the crisis, better than I ever thought possible.

My wife has been on her own journey through this too, and watching us both grow and heal together has been astonishing. We're not the same people we were three years ago. We're better. Stronger. More connected.

I came to this programme one inch away from walking out forever. Today, I can honestly say I'm grateful for where that crisis led me—not because of the pain, but because of the transformation that followed. This programme didn't just save my marriage. It changed my life.

If you're where I was three years ago, standing on the edge, I can't recommend this enough. Give it a chance. You won't believe what's possible!

Julie writes....

The Uglow’s program came to me in the most desperate time of my life. After being totally blindsided after my seemingly happy and content husband of 27 years and with whom I had 5 children with, opened up about 10 years worth of affairs, I honestly thought my life was over. I felt emotionally out of control, incredibly volatile and just sickeningly hopeless. After going through 3 therapists, quickly losing 20lbs, not sleeping much for months on end, I still felt incredible pain every day. I hit rock bottom and contemplated horrible things and pleaded desperately with a God that felt like He had abandoned me and that’s when the Uglow’s program showed up on Google.

I felt skeptical of any online program but something about Pete and Nikki’s message spoke to the more hopeful and perhaps just desperately broken part of my heart and I decided to have a little faith and joined their program.

From that grain of hope I was transformed through Pete and Nikki’s very clear presentation on unconditional love. I grew up Christian and have been taught about unconditional love but the Uglow’s program made me realize I actually had very little understanding of it. Their way of presentation appealed to me. There was a start and a finish, unlike the endless talking in therapy, access to one to one sessions as needed and an online community. They offered efficient, clear and concise lessons and it was very accessible.

My husband chose not to join me on this program which haunted me at first but I was taught and assured that a marriage can still progress even if only one of the members decides to do this work. Again the skeptic rose in me but again I added a grain of hope and faith and this ended up being one of the best decisions of my life.

I joined their program to “fix” my marriage or perhaps “fix” my husband! But it became a journey to discover who I am, find the true self within me that I had lost years ago and build the greatest and most confident “me” I have ever met yet. The freedom of this is better than the best meal you can think of or the most luxurious of vacations. Even though it seems counterintuitive, by focusing on myself it has made my marriage better than ever and we have been married for 30 years now. I have grown into a person that can be a true friend to my husband and able to hear him, see him and give him the safe space he needs to heal and shift to a healthier version of himself. I am by no means great at this everyday but I am miles away from that broken and nearly hopeless woman that showed up on this program’s doorstep.

You can’t put a price on that.

Carol writes....

I started my journey with " restoring love" when my marriage hit crisis and I felt I had nowhere to turn

I could not have predicted the amount of support I would receive, and the carefully crafted learning material that spoke to me as though you already knew me and what I was going through. I learned to reflect on the meaning of love, and to nurture myself to start the healing process, rather than looking at what was wrong in my situation.

Through the coaching I now feel stronger and more able to understand why things go wrong without needing to blame. It has improved my relationships with family, friends and colleagues, and given me a sense of inner peace and happiness I did not previously know I was missing. Embracing the concept of unconditional love has allowed me to tackle my fears and open my heart, and I will always be grateful that I discovered the work you and Pete do to guide us and share what you have learned.

With love and gratitude for you both.

Liam writes....

When I first reached out to Pete, I was drowning in shame. I had betrayed my wife—the person I loved most in the world—and I couldn't even look at myself in the mirror. The guilt was suffocating. Every day I watched the pain in her eyes, pain that I had caused, and I had absolutely no idea how to fix what I'd broken.

I wanted to make amends. I desperately wanted to heal the hurt I'd caused. But I was paralyzed.

Nothing I did seemed like enough. Nothing I said could undo what I'd done. The shame kept pulling me under, and I felt like I was destroying us even further by not knowing how to help her heal.

The programme changed everything for me.

What Pete taught me—what I learned through this journey—was that I couldn't heal my wife. That wasn't my job, and trying to force that healing was actually making things worse. What I could do was show up with unconditional love, not just for her, but for myself too. That second part was the hardest.

Learning to forgive myself while still taking full responsibility for my actions seemed impossible at first. But the programme showed me how. It taught me that shame doesn't serve anyone—not me, not my wife, not our marriage. What serves us is love, accountability, and genuine transformation.

As I embraced these principles, something remarkable happened. The shame began to lift. I found solid ground beneath my feet for the first time in months. I learned how to be present for my wife's pain without collapsing under the weight of my own guilt. I discovered how to love her through this without needing her to make me feel better about what I'd done.

The healing that's happened in our marriage has been beyond anything I could have imagined. My wife has done her own incredible work, and watching us both grow through this has been humbling and beautiful. We're not just recovering—we're building something stronger than what we had before.

I still take full responsibility for the hurt I caused. But I'm no longer mired in shame, and that's made all the difference. I'm present now. I'm whole. And our marriage is alive in a way I didn't think possible after what I'd done.

If you're where I was—lost in shame, not knowing how to make things right—this programme will show you the way. It gave me my life back. It gave us our marriage back.

Kate writes....

When I discovered my husband's affair, I felt like my entire world had been built on a lie. Here we were—a ministry family, leaders in our church community, people others looked to for guidance—and behind closed doors, everything was falling apart.

I thought I understood what love was. I'd taught about it, counseled others about it, lived what I believed was a life centered on it. But in the wake of my husband's betrayal, I realized I had only scratched the surface.

The humiliation was almost unbearable. The shame of being the pastor's wife whose husband had strayed consumed me. I was terrified our church family would find out. What would they think? How could we continue in ministry? How could I face anyone knowing what I knew? The fear of exposure, of judgment, of losing everything we'd built together—it was suffocating.

I came to Pete's programme broken, desperate, and drowning in a toxic mixture of pain, anger, and fear.

What I discovered transformed everything.

The unconditional love taught in this programme wasn't the shallow, religious love I thought I'd been practicing. It was deeper, richer, and more powerful than anything I'd encountered in all my years of faith and ministry. It was love without conditions, without scorekeeping, without the need to protect my image or control outcomes.

As I embraced these teachings, something miraculous happened. The humiliation began to lift. The fear of what others might think lost its grip on me. I found a freedom I didn't even know existed—freedom from needing to appear perfect, freedom from the prison of shame, freedom to experience genuine joy even in the midst of our crisis.

The programme showed me that my worth wasn't tied to my husband's choices or to what others thought of us. It taught me how to love him—and myself—with a grace that felt almost supernatural. Not a weak love that excused his actions, but a powerful love that could hold space for truth, healing, and transformation.

My husband has done deep work through this process too, and watching both of us grow has been extraordinary. Our marriage today is more authentic, more intimate, and more joy-filled than it ever was before—even in our "perfect ministry family" days.

The most surprising gift? I no longer live in fear of anyone finding out. Not because it wouldn't be difficult, but because I've found a level of inner freedom and peace that doesn't depend on maintaining an image. I've discovered what it means to truly live loved, and that has changed everything.

This programme didn't just save my marriage. It liberated me from a prison I didn't even know I was in. The joy I've found isn't dependent on my circumstances being perfect—it's rooted in something far deeper and far more real.

If you're living in fear, humiliation, or the exhaustion of trying to appear strong while you're breaking inside, there is a way through. This programme will show you a freedom you can't even imagine right now. It did for me.

Beth writes....

"I remember the first time I heard Pete say that none of us were unconditionally loved growing up. I didn't argue, but I thought, well that's not true. I had a wonderful childhood! I went on to think and I have always loved my children unconditionally. In fact, I loved my husband unconditionally and look what he did to me in return!!

What I eventually came to terms with is that indeed I, sadly have never loved anyone unconditionally.

What I have learned is that I gave love according to what I was getting. In fact, what I can now clearly see is that for me, the getting actually came first. If you fulfill my expectation, if I approve of your actions and words I then, in return, will show you what I judge to be worthy of my love. Sounds cruel when I say this out loud. It sounds selfish and superior. I actually judge you and decide whether or not you deserve my love. Instead, I may punish you with the withdrawal of my love. My "go to" was to withdraw my affection and attention by ignoring you and giving you the silent treatment. Most often you didn't even know why....it was my silent judgement and decision to not love you, a judgement born in my own fear of not being respected for what I deserved from you.

My love was conditional based on what I got from you, my husband, my children. I didn't know better, I was practicing what I had learned as a child. Now I do know better because I have learned a better way, the true loving way that restores people and their relationships. I have learned this superpower and I choose to set it as my intention, not just sometimes, but every day, to love you with no care for what you are able to give to me.

Forever grateful to Pete and Nikki for teaching me the secret of this "superpower"

Chemi writes...

When I first found this information, I was in agony. My husband had betrayed me with my best friend, and I was desperately searching for... something. Comfort, maybe. Understanding. Proof that I wasn't alone in this nightmare.

I spent weeks—honestly, months—just reading the intro posts in the free FB group from other people. I became obsessed with comparing my situation to theirs. Sometimes I'd feel a strange sense of relief: "Well, at least mine wasn't that bad." Other times I'd feel worse: "These people aren't dealing with what I'm dealing with—they couldn't possibly understand." And then there were moments when I'd feel better simply because I didn't feel so alone. Everyone here was suffering too.

It became a habit, almost a compulsion. Every day I'd scroll through, reading about other people's pain, measuring mine against theirs. I told myself I was doing something productive, that I was working on healing. But I wasn't.

It took me a couple of months to realize that none of this was actually healing me or my marriage. I was stuck in a loop—comparing, contrasting, finding temporary comfort or temporary despair, but never actually moving forward. The wound was still open. The pain was still fresh. Nothing was changing.

The intro videos, though—they were different. Pete's explanations spoke to me in a way nothing else had. There was something about the unconditional love being taught that cut through all the noise in my head. It felt true in a way I couldn't explain. Still, I hesitated. Watching videos felt safer than actually engaging, than actually doing the work. Finally, I took the leap and booked a call. That decision changed everything.

The moment I stopped comparing my pain to everyone else's and started actually applying what was being taught, real healing began. I learned that it didn't matter if my situation was "worse" or "better" than anyone else's. What mattered was what I was going to do with it. How I was going to show up. What kind of love I was going to choose.

The programme gave me tools I didn't even know existed. It showed me how to move from being a victim of my circumstances to being an active participant in my own healing and in the healing of my marriage. The transformation has been profound—not just in our relationship, but in who I've become as a person.

If you're where I was—stuck in the comparison trap, reading everyone else's stories but not actually taking steps forward—I encourage you to take that leap. Book the call. Do the work. Your healing is waiting on the other side of that decision.

You deserve more than temporary comfort. You deserve actual transformation. This programme will give you that if you let it.

Ready to Begin Your Own Journey?

Book a clarity call today to take the first step toward rebuilding your marriage into something extraordinary. Book a call here